I had a long discussion today about reframing and reclaiming my lost childhood. Much happened during that time that I thought would mar me deeply and forever. Such is not the case.
How much do those of us who have suffered treasure the happy times? We have known deep pain and we are in a position to experience the stark contrast of deep happiness.
So how does one bring that lost childhood into a positive framework? Following are a few suggestions:
* Recognize that unhappy experiences occur in a definite framework of time. Most truly traumatic events took up a limited amount of hours or minutes. Was I traumatized one hundred percent of the time? No, I was not. So I look at the limited span of each traumatic event and I feel the contrast of all the truly happy times. In this way, I can reclaim my lost childhood.
* Recognize that the impact of trauma can be matched by that of happiness.
* Fully own the results of the trauma and, when appropriate, confront the abuser, and gain your power back. Reframing with memories of contentment does NOT erase the trauma but it does mitigate it. Lost childhood memories can be softened.
* Realize the acountabilty of those who have hurt us and then make the resolve to become fully accountable for our own actions.
* Seek counseling.
* Become involved in community. Oftentimes, we did not find support within our neighborhoods. So the process of community involvement can be critical to growth. Seek group involvement: Join a church; Become active in politics; Get out there and wear your gifts and weaknesses with pride!
Dear readers, feel free to share your ideas of reclaiming a lost childhood.
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